The above photo was taken last week in our backyard. Our youngest son has recently discovered the joys of widdle biddy baby toes, and spends quite a bit of time figuring out how to get them in his mouth. He's wearing the Weezer onesie that I made him last month. You can see more photos from that day over at our Flickr account.
Last night we all went out for Italian, and just as our drinks were dropped off, the J. Crew of American families was seated across from us mom, dad, four beautiful little girls decked out to the hilt in dresses and bows, and the baby brother not much older than our youngest son. The first words out of their waitresses' mouth were, "Wow! You guys kept trying 'til you finally got the baby boy didn't you?" I glanced over to see the mother fumble through her response, smile and clumsily nod. And it wasn't really a "yes" nod. It was more of a tense "I'm answering you as nicely as I can, now please get our drinks and take our dinner order while all of our children are still being polite and not being real, thank you very much" kind of nod.
Why do people automatically assume your life can't possibly be complete unless you have a child of each gender? Not that there's anything wrong with that. No, not at all. But we only have two sons and we already get that all the time. People are constantly stopping by Todd's desk at work to admire the latest photos of the boys, and it's inevitably followed by, "So when are you two going to try for the girl?" People look at me like I have two heads when they ask if we plan on trying again soon for a member of the female persuasion, and I answer back, "We haven't decided yet but when and if we do, I'll be cheering on 'blue' at the ultrasound."
Yes, that's right. You heard me Internet. If we are ever blessed with a third child I will not be disappointed if my little girl has a penis. (Inside joke there.) There will not be anything missing in my life. I wanted my boys. Both my boys. And I was beyond excited when I found out they had a winky rather than a hoo-ha. When you come from a long line of girls-only on your side of the family, it's actually quite fun to chase lizards rather than pimp out Barbie for a change. And don't even get me started on the differences at puberty...
I figure after so many years of infertility, God is going to give us what we need when He wants. Who are we to question? If that means "just" two boys, so be it. For years I honestly never thought I'd get to hold even one. I now have more than I could have ever possibly prayed, hoped and dreamed for. The only thing I feel I'm "missing" out on at the moment by not having a girl is an obscene amount of debt to this company. As fast as it goes by, I'd like to enjoy both of their little lives to the fullest in the here and now, rather than focusing on some future event that may or may not ever occur.
And I guess people seemed just as shocked after our first son was born that we didn't go straight from the delivery room to the bedroom to try and give him a sibling. As close as they are together in age, it certainly worked out that way. But it wasn't planned. (We "couldn't have kids", remember?) But if we'd had just one, he was more than we'd ever wished for and I don't think any of us would have felt our lives incomplete for it...
Thus endeth the rant. It just continually shocks me the things that fall out of people's mouths regarding your children (or lack thereof) in their feeble attempts at making small-talk. Like you'd ever go up to someone and say, "Your new husband is great. But are you going to keep trying until you find that certain someone that will land you in that next income-tax bracket?"
BONUS ROUND: "Top Ten Digital Photography Tips" courtesy of fabrica imago