[The hunt for pink October]
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[All those simple things are simply too complicated...]
[Hey Andy, are you goofing on Elvis?]
[We interrupt your regularly scheduled programming...]

Don't have to tell you I love your precious heart

[take my hand - take my whole life too]

The above photo was taken of father and (second) son on June 26, 2005, when our new baby was 10 days old. It can also be seen in a larger size at Flickr.

This afternoon I witnessed one of the most disturbing daytime TV ads I've ever seen and had to share... I call it "When Men (Obviously) Run Ad Agencies".

Scene: An animated Always maxi pad, being tucked gently into bed under a sheet below a starry nighttime sky [click here for screencap]

Slogan: Have a happy period. Always.

Now I've described my periods as a lot of things since my early teen years. But HAPPY?!? Well then might I offer in return my own slogan to the Always ad-man: "Have a jolly kidney stone. . "

When I said, "What I wouldn't give to hear just one new more song..." Well, let me take a moment for us and clarify. I meant with Michael Hutchence singing. Not some chick with cheap- tattoos. Not some dude with a spiky mohawk. This show is total sacrilege. They are bastardizing my memories of INXS and of my teen girl fantasies of Hutchence in tight leather pants! The lead singer of INXS should be MALE. Screw PC and "womyn's lib". The INXS lead singer should croon to me with bedroom eyes and make me swoon. Not make my husband say, "Let's watch the 'fancy foods' episode of Unwrapped instead."

Todd found an interesting article over the weekend on evolution and childbirth. I particularly liked this passage:

Consider the human body. Ask yourself, if you were designing the optimum exit for a fetus, would you engineer a route that passes through the narrow confines of the pelvic bones? Add to this the tragic reality that childbirth is not only painful in our species but downright dangerous and sometimes lethal, owing to a baby's head being too large for the mother's birth canal.

This design flaw is all the more dramatic because anyone glancing at a skeleton can see immediately that there is plenty of room for even the most stubbornly large-brained, misoriented fetus to be easily delivered anywhere in that vast, non-bony region below the ribs. (In fact, this is precisely the route obstetricians follow when performing a caesarean section.).... An engineer who designed such a system from scratch would be summarily fired....

Admittedly, it could be argued that the dangers and discomforts of childbirth were intelligently, albeit vengefully, planned, given Genesis' account of God's judgment upon Eve: As punishment for Eve's disobedience in Eden, "in pain you shall bring forth children." (Might this imply that if she'd only behaved, women's vaginas would have been where their bellybuttons currently reside?)[link]

And speaking of birth...this photo goes out to the grabby-hands clerk at Home Depot.

Still in the baby category...if you just can't wait 'til the ultrasound to find out the gender of your baby, now you can fork over $250+ for a "99.9% accuracy gender test" as early as 5 weeks along. Not that we weren't on the edge of the exam table hoping to hear "it's a boy!" both times by week 18 — but for that kind of cash, I think I'd rather just fork over five bucks for a bottle of Drano crystals instead. We're 2-for-2 with that test now.

And if you were anxiously awaiting the review of my new super-shoulder boulder holder... It has arrived, and I absolutely love it! It fits so much better than the ones from Target and Motherhood Maternity (somewhat ironic since the sizing for this brand is S, M, L, and XL which made me a bit nervous to order it). And I no longer feel like I raided the armoires at the local nursing home (no pun intended) for my lingerie needs. Most importantly, the husband was extremely pleased to not be staring at the "Cross Your Heart" catalog come-to-life for a change. Next payday, I'll be adding the aqua (and possibly salmon) versions to my collection. Hasta la bye-bye granny whites!

[val stars] [val stars] [val stars] [val stars]
I give the Belabumbum Copacabana Lace Nursing Bra four out of five mommy-
it loses one star because the cup-clasps are plastic and a bit more difficult one-handed

To close, just a quick PSA and apology. It's only taken me two days to get this entry together...and you should see my inbox right now (currently with 198 messages)... By all means, fire away with the e-mails as I love reading them and getting the 'adult conversation' when time permits. Just please allow for turn-around time. Lots and lots of turn-around time. I have good intentions on writing back I swear (and I'm sorry if you're still waiting to hear back from me), but unless you are the owner of one of these sets of cute little baby toes (or are the male owner of this fine derrière), unfortunately you don't get first-come, first-serve priority for the next few weeks. Please continue to hold...

posted on 07.11.2005 @ 10:23 PM :: mail a comment  
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Original images and works ©2001-2007 to Todd and Robyn
Orlando and Tampa area newborn and maternity photographer

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