The above photo of our youngest son was taken last month. I was playing around with an 85mm f/1.4 lens that I'd rented, and now totally covet. Click here to see it in the original-crop.
Last night I think my husband and I realized just how entirely pathetic we are as a couple. He left just before dinner for a week in Vegas. (Gets back late Friday night.) It's a 'mandatory' thing - his company's annual conference - and I guess 99.9% of the company is there.
This is a vacation we had actually planned to take together back in January when it was first announced. We've never been and have wanted to go forever. But wanting and doing are two totally different things after you balance the checkbook. Since this time the hotel and half the airfare would have been covered, we thought 3 "BAR" symbols had popped up on the ol' life slot machine for a change. We were going to schedule a layover at DFW, send a couple of 30 and 39 lb. carry-ons off the plane with their grandmas, and live la vida loca. But not so fast there, my friends! Six weeks ago a company memo was sent out that mandated this was a "no spouses" trip (hear the collective-thud of company wives kicking their poor unsuspecting husbands square in the jimmy when we were all given the news). And better yet...they were all being assigned roommates! Oh goodie. Fun for everyone. Well unless of course they wanted to pay an additional $200/night out of their own pockets to not recreate the "Planes, Trains and Automobiles" pillows scene.
So fast-forward to yesterday. After obsessively checking three separate flight-trackers for almost five hours and watching that little plane icon cross over the Gulf of Mexico, up through Mobile, and eventually right smack-dab over Oklahoma ("hi mom!"), I was left unpatiently (and nervously) waiting until he landed. Up until that phonecall, I moped around the apartment like a little lost puppy. Occasionally that would be interrupted by such exciting conversations as:
"Mommy watch Cars."
"Mommy I would like my crayons."
"Mommy daddy is up high in the sky."
But after it was time for the boys to head to bed, I just sat in our room like, "What do I do now?" That's always "our time". Our time might include cleaning off TiVo or just sitting side-by-side with our laptops while we bitch and moan about paying for over 700 channels of cable and still being stuck on HGTV again. But we do it...together.
This was his first business trip since the oldest son was 10 weeks old. And I'm just not one of those wives that gets excited when her husband leaves town over the prospect of a little 'girl time'. I don't have a secret unfulfilled passion for hours on end of Lifetime TV. I don't have a girlfriend here in town yet that I can sit around with talking about my period and the Anna Nicole DNA test results. I got married so I wouldn't have to sit in bed alone eating Lean Cuisine at 10 p.m. I...actually like hanging out with my husband. Every night. Even after over 10 years of marriage.
And I guess Todd was equally mopey once he got checked in his room last night, too. Because he totally ditched his roommate after they'd checked out the hotel and walked through the casino, and he found some quiet area off a random hallway to call me back and surprise me. And much like an old Seinfeld episode, we talked about nothing until he was ready to fall asleep just after midnight his time. Just being stupid. Just being us.
I was definitely NOT sleeping single in a double-bed last night, however. Even Lunesta didn't give me my normal reprieve. At 3:30 a.m., still wide-awake, I went back to the guest bedroom and crawled in next to my oldest son and held him 'til I finally passed out. Even then, I didn't sleep good.
I miss my lobster.
P.S. Shameless vote-whoring - I've been nominated for "Best Photography Blog" at the Blogger's Choice Awards. Vote for me if you are so inclined. Do it...for the children.